I love how unexpected Jesus is. Not how he can be, but how he is. Because, at least in my life, he never works in the same way twice. And I am never bored in the moments that I truly seek him. In fact, in those moments, I'm never more alive!!!
The past week, I have encountered the glorious love of The Lord Jesus Christ in a way I had forgotten existed. A way different than ever before, yet familiar all the same. All week he has been digging at me, taking away the old, and bringing in the new. Getting rid of the muck, and bringing in the light. And it's been beyond words. I've realized things I've allowed into my life that shouldn't be there. Things I didn't even realize didn't bring glory to God. And I wonder why I let them bother me. I look around at the lives of other believers, other believers I respect and admire who do the same things I was doing, yet I somehow know that for me, they're wrong. And to be quite honest, I always wondered why that was. I would think, " Here's this amazing person who loves The Lord, doing the exact same thing is me, yet I constantly feel convicted about it." And then finally, my question was answered. It was SO simple, yet so life changing. On Saturday night I walked into church, and I was expectant. My soul had been craving teaching of the word deeply the last week. I sat with two girlfriends, and the evening service began. I lost myself in worship as I hadn't in months. Surrendering myself to The Lord, and feeling him chip away even more that was me and not him. As we sat and offering went by, I began to feel thankful. I figured a really good worship session was to be my big blessing of the night. And I was wrong. Because it was only PART of it. Our senior Pastor began to give the message, and I felt my heart convicted in ways I hadn't thought of in months, years, ever. He spoke on rediscovering the awe of God. And it was tremendous. There were several things that hit me, but one in particular was when he said " Yes, when we believe in Christ we all as believers have salvation. However, I'm going to be bold enough to say that all of our relationships with Christ aren't the same. Because the more you draw near to God, the more he'll draw near to you. If you want a good relationship with Christ, a life fully lived for him, than you better obey him immediately. " I sat there dumbstruck. That was it! That was the answer!!! When I drew closer to The Lord, things in my life, maybe not even 'bad' things, began to fade away. Probably not because they were inherently evil, but because the closer you draw to The Lord, the better the things he has for you are. Better than you could ever imagine...I walked out of church and knew that this month was to be set aside for The Lord in a way I'd never done before. Let him work his will into my life until he was all that shined through me. Until none of me is left. I know this is a lifelong process, but I also know that forming habits is hard to do when you let every day distractions in. So I deleted my facebook app on my phone. This may sound silly to most people, but I'm telling you, I haven't checked facebook since Saturday night, and this is what The Lord has already done!
Sunday morning I awoke feeling a sort of "bring on the day" feeling. I was full of joy, and full of The Lord. I knew He was working in ways I couldn't ever expect. I get to church and I begin to work a bakesale with a few of my friends. I bring up this idea I had talked about with one of my friends months ago, and we'd never gotten around to it. But all week I had felt the prompting of The Lord, resurrecting this dream within me. Out of nowhere my friend goes "let me text Cheryl right now so we can talk to her about it." Cheryl is our senior Pastor's wife. To my great surprise, she showed up and loved the idea. We started talking details, and through prayer and fasting, the first meeting of this idea will be happening in November. Holy.Cow. Isn't that crazy?!? A little step of faith for something I've been longing for and God answered it on the spot. HOW GREAT IS HE!?!?!? I then saw a precious friend walking around with her baby boy. I hadn't seen her in years, but we'd always kept up through facebook. She has been a constant source of encouragement in life, and to be quite honest, I knew I was going to miss our correspondence while I was giving facebook up! We chatted for a few minutes and again, I was blown away by how God blesses when we choose to give something up because he asked us to. After first service, I headed to the youth group. The Middle School and High School were meeting together for a day of worship. I always love when we do this, because The Lord seems to always work in great ways. I walk in and greet several students that I've grown to love. Some new some old, and I was excited to see their hearts of worship. It always blesses me. And that service was no exception. It was one of the sweetest worship sessions I have ever been a part of. My heart was so full of love for those kids, love for my Savior, and joy because I knew that there was no turning back. I tell you what, there is nothing better in this world than getting to work with kids, and see them fall deeper in love with Jesus. For the first time in years, I had tears fill my eyes during worship, because it was so pure. So incredibly beautiful. After that glorious session, I went to dance with my fellow Israel travelers. Once practice was done, I drove home with my windows down, blasting worship music. I entered my neighborhood, and several kids were outside on their bikes enjoying the sunshine. I smiled at them as I drove by, and pulled up to my house. As I was parking, I noticed a little girl on her bike. I smiled and she smiled back, she seemed to be waiting for me. I turned off my car, gathered my things and got out. I smiled again as I looked at the girl, and she promptly said, " can I ask you a question?" "Of course!" I reply " Are you a Christian?" I smile even bigger at this precious girl, " Yes! I sure am! Are you?" At this point she's glowing. " Oh! I wasn't sure, because I heard your music and I wondered 'Is she a Christian?" I began chatting with this young girl. She's in 5th grade and very involved in her Church. She told me that when she grows up she is going to be a missionary to China. Her genuine love for The Lord blessed my very soul. Here was a precious, innocent little girl, so un tampered with by the world. And my hope and prayer for her is that she never loses hope of that dream. Because I remember having faith like that once. And I am beginning to remember what it feels like to live it. We chatted a while longer, and then parted ways. What a blessing. And today, after my first job, I stopped at chick fil a to get myself some lunch. The last meat i'll be eating for a while. I ordered my food, worship music playing again, and I noticed the gentleman in front of me staring at me through his car windows. I didn't think too much of it. As I was waiting to drive up to the window I thought " You know, why not? I'm going to pay for the meal of the people behind me." I pull up to the window, and to my complete shock, the woman said " The gentleman in front of you paid for your meal." I beamed and told her I would like to do the same for the people behind me. I couldn't believe it! God works in mysterious ways. I hope that that gentleman caused a chain reaction!
So this is my point, I suppose. Drawing nearer to God sounds intimidating. I'll admit there have been times, and until recently I WAS scared to give it all up. To give my life, my relationships, my hopes and desires completely to my Savior. The thought of giving him full control is terrifying, until we do. Even if it's piece by little piece, your life WILL begin to transform. You will no longer be seen, but Christ in you will shine. How glorious! I guess I just wanted to encourage all of you because, we have the power to change this world, and I don't want to offend anyone, but we're not going to do it by living mediocre Christian lives. We're not! We are called to stand boldly and courageously in our faith because we're not in control of anything anyway! Christ alone is! Let him chip away at you until the only thing that people can see is him! Because after all, there is nothing in heaven or on earth as glorious as our Savior.
